If you want people to "get" you, here's what to do
Growing up, I was the youngest of four. The baby. Big surprise, eh?
Each one of us played a role. One was Nice, the other was Pretty and the oldest, well, he was Smart.
I, on the other hand, was Too Much.
Once I got a laugh, I couldn’t stop. I literally couldn’t stop. I would repeat jokes, one-liners ad nauseam. Ask my siblings.
Yet underneath my Too Loud, Too Fun, Too Much exterior, I was living in the Crummy Zone. I thought something was wrong with me. Wrong. Bad. You name it.
Oh, then there was my Catholic grade school experience, which invented “I’m not worthy” long before Wayne’s World. It was what I recited in church day after day. Sr. Alicia, glaring with rage and contempt, confirmed that.
So at home I was Too Much, and at school I wasn’t worth much at all.
It's kind of hilarious when I put it that way!
It wasn’t until I learned how to step into the shoes of others and listen to their story – that I started to understand how we all get stuck in our own narratives.
Most of us latch onto what’s wrong with us. It doesn’t even matter how loving or stable your family is.
These messages will keep us in the Crummy Zone, if we let them.
For example, when I heard, “You’re too much,” I simply didn’t let myself hear the flip side of their statement: “You delight us, you marvel us, you are uniquely wonderful.”
I know they meant it; they may have even said it; I just didn’t hear it.
If you want people to "get" you in an authentic way, Embrace Your Story. It’s not a quick fix, but I can help you make the process easier and enlightening.
Here are Three Steps to Embrace Your Story:
Examine. Self Examination, that is. Reflect. Do some digging. Yeah, it’s your story, you’d think you’d know it, but once you look at your life and all your experiences, struggles, and relationships, you'll see themes in a new light.
Extract. Extracting your story isn’t easy. It’s like separating a yolk from the white. It takes care, and it sure takes chutzpah. It just does. Which stories and moments of your life will resonate with others? Which stories feel like a risk to share but are safe enough that you're vulnerable for the right reasons?
Express. Put it all together. And see how the choices you make define you, not your challenges. You’ll need to speak it. OUT LOUD. ‘Cuz it don’t mean a thing if it ain’t got that swing.
Embracing your story means you’ll have the freedom to choose which stories you want to hold on to, which stories you want to share, and yes, which stories you want to let go. Most of my clients come in with one narrative, and leave with a different one.
The world needs your leadership. And the best way to share your powerful message with the world is to connect more authentically through your story.
Embracing Your Story is a skill you can learn.
Come, Embrace Your Story at one of my workshops or 1:1 coaching. I will take care of you, and help you along your way.