Listening to the Little Girl Inside

“Take care of that little girl,” I heard Katy say.

I had just moved the pillow beneath my hips to under my head. Out of the corner of my right eye, I could see six other bodies stretched out on their mats, resting in quiet surrender. The sun was shining—a gift. At Stinson Beach, the fog can be so thick and heavy that you don’t know where you are. But this morning, I knew exactly where I was: hosting a two-day retreat, a space I had envisioned to fill us up through deep connection.

The first day had been about going deeper. We built a container of trust simply by listening to each other. Yes, telling our story chips away at our own healing, but there’s something transformational about hearing someone else’s inner world. It shifts how we see ourselves. Our hearts expand. We remember we are not alone. And in that authenticity, the magic happens. Alchemy takes over.

I had never done Qigong or ‘group’ acupuncture before meeting my guest practitioner Katy Barry. My virtual assistant introduced us. “Like-minded souls,” she said. When I met Katy over Zoom a few months before, I immediately knew she could offer the somatic work needed to help integrate the transformation.

So here it was the second morning. Lying on my mat with my eyes closed, body still, I was surrendering to the moment. Colors pulsed behind my lids—deep purple turned red, then orange and yellow, shifting into turquoise and green. (Yes it was akin to a light show!) When Katy came over to remove the needles from my ears, I placed my palms over my eyes. All I could see was yellow. Bright, radiant yellow.

A breath rose deep in my chest. Delight rippled through me—like the heart-expanding joy of witnessing the sunrise with my dipping crew back home. When I opened my eyes, I felt as if I were in a trance.

As I slowly sat up, still wobbly, I turned to the group. “I’d love for us to use this moment to look inside and write,” I said. “We’ve spent time nurturing that little girl within us—now let’s hear from her. What does she have to say to you?”

I popped the breakfast burritos in the oven, grabbed my journal and curled up in the corner of the sun-kissed room. My back was to the group, my knees tucked in close. The moment my pen touched the paper, the words—and the tears—began to flow.

The letter from my younger self surprised me. She told me I didn’t have to worry about her anymore. She was going to be okay. She acknowledged the ways I had created a different life for myself. She recognized the love I had given, the love I had received. And in that recognition, I found something I didn’t even realize I was seeking: she saw me for who I had worked so hard to become.

It was a powerful experience. One I, of course, shared with the group--and now with you. When we witness each other’s growth, we grow, we shift, we evolve. And when we witness our own growth—when we see ourselves fully—we become whole.

Who knew I could create a retreat that was both a gift to others - and to myself?

We earn who we become. And when we embrace our story and all that we have learned, we no longer seek approval, validation, or external recognition. Because we find it where it’s been waiting to be found all along—inside each one of us.

We just need to find a way to listen to what she has to say.

Photo credit to the amazing Katy Barry.💗